Yes I'm more pissed than ever. Look at the Monty Python crew. Fresh out of Oxbridge in their early twenties and they change the history of the world. And then look at me. What the fuck am I doing in my early twenties? Learning Louis Pasteur's fucking date of birth. FOR MY ENGLISH EXAM.
Yes I have lived for two decades. TWO FUCKING DECADES which another thing that pisses me off because I never got to feel 19. I was 18 one year and the next I was 20 because it was sprung up on me that I was not exactly born in the year I thought I was. The only relief this bit of knowledge gave me was that I was not a wooden pig in the chinese zodiac. I didn't like being a pig. But damn it I loved my date of birth. Now my entire life is based on a lie. I didn't get a chance to say goodbye to my teens and prepare myself for big things that I was supposed to do in my twenties. Turns out I am in my twenties and am still fucking living an insignificant unhelpful life. Seems like my youth will be fucked and I will spend all my so called fucking "energy" sitting in a room trying to learn the name of the author of "On Destroying Fucking Books" which is J.C Squire by the way.
I envy that Oxbridge lot. I envy them with all my fucking heart. To know that you are fit to start doing things in the real world after graduating college and have the opportunity to do so in your early twenties is so. fucking. lucky. But here. Here you just fucking sit on your fucking books until you're fucking thirty to achieve something in real fucking life.
That's my biggest fucking problem with being 20 right now. I'm living an unhelpful fucked up life studying things that will only help me if I lived in the fucked up world of books within a fucked up room in a fucked up in the country of fucks. And from where I am sitting right now, it looks like the next 10 years of my life will be spent in books. Obviously things could be different but it makes me angry right now and it's my blog. MY BLOG.
I want to test my potentials I want to use them I want to help people I want to get out of my fucking house and do something that means something.
The worst part: Fucking summer vacations. I could perhaps do an internship somewhere. Do something practical. Put my knowledge to some good use right? WRONG! IT'S SIX MORE MONTHS OF STUDYING FUCKING THINGS I DON'T REALLY GIVE A FUCK ABOUT. DO I FUCKING CARE HOW MANY PICOGRAMS OF ADENOSINE ARE THERE IN A FUCKING DNA? NO. BUT THAT IS WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO FUCKING LEARN.
That's my biggest fucking problem with being 20 right now. I'm living an unhelpful fucked up life studying things that will only help me if I lived in the fucked up world of books within a fucked up room in a fucked up in the country of fucks. And from where I am sitting right now, it looks like the next 10 years of my life will be spent in books. Obviously things could be different but it makes me angry right now and it's my blog. MY BLOG.
I want to test my potentials I want to use them I want to help people I want to get out of my fucking house and do something that means something.
The worst part: Fucking summer vacations. I could perhaps do an internship somewhere. Do something practical. Put my knowledge to some good use right? WRONG! IT'S SIX MORE MONTHS OF STUDYING FUCKING THINGS I DON'T REALLY GIVE A FUCK ABOUT. DO I FUCKING CARE HOW MANY PICOGRAMS OF ADENOSINE ARE THERE IN A FUCKING DNA? NO. BUT THAT IS WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO FUCKING LEARN.
Put your youth and energy to test in real life? ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY? THAT IS NOT WHAT YOUTH IS FUCKING FOR! SIT IN YOUR FUCKING HOMES AND STUDY YOU FUCKING IRRESPONSIBLE ASHOLES! YOU'RE NOT MATURE ENOUGH UNTIL ALL YOUR ENERGY HAS BEEN SUCKED OUT OF YOU! Fucking youth.
FUCKING IMPRACTICAL EDUCATION.
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